Nice guys do not finish last. I am marrying one of them in 3 weeks, and I don't know anyone who is more gentle, humble, and sincerely kind than he is. He also knows how to kick ass when it's necessary, might I add, but has no desire whatsoever to be an alpha male. Nor would I ever marry an alpha male. Then again, as with impetuous1, I have a very assertive personality and we match up very well in that sense. I see us as complete equals, and I know he feels the same. Once again, I would not be marrying someone who believed any differently.
Who cares about what guys are "supposed" to be? Be who you are, without fear or insecurity, and they will come. But first you have to work on that insecurity... and I highly recommend counseling, too. I've been there, plenty of my male and female friends have been there, and I respect people more who go to counseling than those who adamantly refuse.
But that's just my opinion.
