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Originally Posted by Ustwo
Catch 22, until you try it, you won't know if you are over it.
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This is true to a very close point. there are different ways to feel like you are able to do this separation, but until you actually DO the deed, so-to-speak, you won't know for sure.
As a suggestion to those interested in honestly trying it, find a local house that hosts parties, and just attend one evening. EVERY place we have ever attended has a simple policy that NOBODY is required to participate, and each couple decides their own level of participation. Apache, maybe you and you husband could go to a party and just watch. See how you two feel, and then if you are ready, consider what is called "soft-swap" which is where the only swapping you do is together, in the same room, but only oral is allowed. Make your own rules, but STICK TO THEM the first night. No matter HOW much fun you are having. Then the next day you can sit down together and talk about it. If you are comfortable, then you can make the next step, if not, then you haven't really gone so far that you would feel very uncomfortable. This is not for everyone. I have seen couples coming in to the party house ready to go, and wind up fighting later that night. You MUST come to a common understanding of the limits BEFORE you arrive. Good luck to you, and everyone interested.
Also, on a side note, those that have done the swinging before, maybe you might be willing to post how your first experience went? Not asking for details (unless you want to PM them to me!
) but more on how you got started, what you allowed to happen, etc!
