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Originally Posted by uptown
how many people with high sex drives here get tired of feeling like they beg and grovel for sex from their partners ? How many of you find it such a turn off over time that you decline the rare offer the lower drive parter may make ?
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*raises hand*
But LPM and I have talked about this endlessly. It's a vicious cycle where I wait awhile for her to initiate, and then get impatient after 3-4 weeks and start a fight, with the intent to break up. At that point she gives in, we have sex, and the cycle repeats. Overall she feels guilty for not having the drive I do because she feels she isn't good enough for me, and I feel guilty for having the drive I do because I should love her for more than her body.
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Originally Posted by Toaster126
Resentment kills relationships.
In my mind, the only difference between a friendship and a romantic relationship should be the sexual nature. If you aren't having a good sexual relationship, try to fix it or leave. You want your SO to be your SO, not a platonic friend.
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Of course, in addition to what I said before, Toaster126 basically stated my view on relationships for me. I don't really need an SO for anything but the sexual aspect because I have other friends who have more in common with me, more similar interests, more similar lines of thinking, and in general tend to do a better job of "filling in the gaps" I need filled to feel like my life is complete and satisfying.
I've been in this predicament for months, and have made many posts about this. Some of those posts started more fights. But, speaking rhetorically, what am I supposed to do? I'm not really look for an answer because nobody's qualified to give me one. But I do know that it's wearing down on me, and I wanted to take the time to vent.
Edit:
I'd like to add that she just read this post, and stated that (as I expected) she feels guilty for me even bringing this up. Our sex life is dead for a large variety of reasons: her eating disorders, her back problems, her chronic pain, the child abuse she endured growing up, and more. Often it's more than I can handle, to constantly have to be Atlas supporting the world on my shoulders, when really what I need to help me wind down is a good screw and a margarita.