I always tell prospective employers I would never embellish a resume because I have a hard enough time living up to realistic expectations! 
No one has ever asked to see my diploma, but then again, the principals of two of the three jobs I've had since graduation were guest instructors (i.e - they were practicing professionals in my degree) at my alma mater while I went there - so they knew me and my work.
But hired me anyway  
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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
It won't hurt your fashion sense, either.
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