Used to be in a relationship like this, well.. Almost like this anyway.
Started out just fine, relationship developed nicely making progress and bonding both emotionally and physically. Sex was awesome and everything seemed to be going just great.
We moved in to an apartment together, really seeing a future with each other. Things were just fine until at about 6 months after we moved in she started the routine you play along. All of a sudden the sex became less, teasing was a daily occurrence leaving me frustrated and down. She was obviously power tripping on it, trying it out for kicks at first and then got high on the power she thought she had over me.
I was almost at the breaking point of throwing her out on the street (apartment was in my name and where I live I could do this and expect to have my side of it given a fair trial if she decided to take legal actions).
Let me tell you, it was painful like nothing else, (most guys think they have experienced blue balls but give it at about a month of getting teased to the breaking point and not getting any release and you enter a whole new dimension of pain few men have experienced) it hurt both physically and emotionally, it was a deep rooted feeling of being humiliated and abused that no man, not even a true submissive would stand for without a safeword. Problem was, it started out so good and nicely, up until she started that bullshi* it was a match like I had never experienced before. I loved her and was more than reluctant to just kick her out.
I tried talking to her about it, she of course blew me off, totally lost in her power tripp and totally disregarding my feelings.
I made a final reach out to this wonderful community and they reassured me, talking was the only answer. First get her down from her power tripp then set an ultimatum. It was the only way anything of any substance could actually be saved from train wreck she caused.
I'm not going to go into the gory details about what I did to break through to her as I was forced to use a leverage on her that still remains private but practically I blackmailed her out of her high.
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Originally Posted by FoxyLucy
At each stage in between he could end it, but he doesn’t because (i) he thinks sex is just around the corner and (ii) he’s invested so much time, effort and money - I have expensive tastes! lol
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After reading this.. You know there are actually two very ugly words to describe a woman who does these things (to the letter of you description).
I have yet to hear a happy ending for a woman who fits either description.
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Originally Posted by FoxyLucy
I look at it like, this. (1) If he’s just going out with me for sex, he’s a bastard. If he’s not, then he obviously sees something in me worth staying for. It is partly a power thing, (2) guys will do pretty much anything for sex, so if I keep him aroused and frustrated he’s putty in my hands. I get a guy who’ll worship the ground I work on, treat me like a princess and have the most passionate sex of any of my friends - though he has to wear delay cream!
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1) Why does that make him a bastard? What's so wrong with wanting sex? It's obviously okay for you to want sex but why does he automagically turn into a Bastard if he wants it?
2) Correction, boy with serious self esteem issues, no true submissive man would stand for that kind of treatment without having a safeword or a way to "blow of the steam" (or.. maybe your guy already have.. stringing you along hoping you will come to your senses while having a little "outlet" on the side) A submissive isn't a doormat, he/she is still a human being..