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Oh, come on! Everyone knows a tinfoil hat has to be properly grounded to work, otherwise it just acts as an antenna focusing the mind control waves deeper into your brain. I suggest a copper wire (approx. 2ft longer than you are tall) be soldered onto the back of the hat while the other end drags on the ground. Any other course of action is pure folly and madness. You're only helping THEM.
(I like the fez.)
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If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.
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