Jimellow

Girls like friends because they provide a cushion to fall back on when the asshole they are dating throws them aside.

I tend to get the close friends route instead of relationship route myself, but I don't oppose it, as I've yet to meet a girl I can honestly say I remotely desired spending the rest of my life with; and ultimately, that is my key factor in judging my interest in a relationship.

My experience with females is that they tend to say they desire certain things, yet end up going after/dating guys that are completely opposite this desire. A good friend is a bit stale, too nice, and a lack in negativity also results in a lack of drama. It's boring, and boring is not a big turn on for the females I've met.

Instead (again, based solely on my experience), the girls I know tend to date assholes, fall back on a close friend, while not leaving a shitty relationship, and leaning heavily on the friend when required.

Now, this seems like a very cynical view, and it is. However, after having discussed with this a few close female friends, they've admitted doing as much.

I do not mind being there for a close friend in need at all. I do mind when a close friend disappears and only shows up when they need something or are in a bad state in life. Friendship takes work, and I know quite a few people that reap the benefits without upholding their end of the friendship.

Regarding the "be an asshole" approach.. That seems stupid to me. If you really are an asshole, then be one. Otherwise, I recommend being yourself and letting genuinely interested females find you. If you change your life to fulfill the desires of a female you want, you ultimately are just posing and being fake. As a result, you are just tricking her into liking you, and unless you intend to keep up the act for an entire lifetime, things likely aren't going to work out anyway.

One thing I will recommend is this... If you find a female you want to date, make it clear you want to date her. Do not start off the relationship with indecesiveness about what you want, because that will ultimately lead to friendship. If you want to date a girl, ask her out, tell her you want to date.. Whatever, but don't start off as just being friends, because that will be very desirable for her, as it will allow her to take advantage of the benefits of a very solid friendship (you ultimately want more than that anyway, so you will be very devoted), while also going and legitimately dating other guys.

If you want to be friends, then just be friends. If you want to date, I highly recommend doing it from the getgo. Otherwise, you are going to have a relationship in which you are likely on different levels of interest, and it's very unlikely you will have the balance of interest that is key to a relationship succeeding on a dating level. IE, you want to date, she is comfortable just being friends, or vice versa. Dating right away doesn't eliminate the chance of imbalance, but it certainly lessens the chances of it occuring.

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