ratbastid

That's pretty much the attitude to shoot for.

I got broken up with about three years ago, at a time when I was totally unprepared for it. There were other circumstances that made it harder than your average breakup, too. I basically did everything I had to do to train myself out of thinking of her in an intimate or sexual way. After a little while, I was able to be "cool" around her--laid back, not expecting or hoping for anything. It was actually all the pressure I had put on her to be close to me that had been the problem in our relationship in the first place. Now, three years later, we're back together and closer than we've ever been. It's not as if the breakup never happened, it's like that was a necessary speedbump, and exposed issues that we had to deal with to get where we are now.

You've got to honestly be over her, while still open to the possibility that something might happen there. She's got to get that you've gotten past it.

The analogy I use here is: ever played with a puppy? A puppy's favorite game is to dance around just out of arm's reach. If you lunge for the puppy, it'll skitter away from you. You'll NEVER catch the puppy. But if you sit down and be still, the puppy will come up and investigate you. If you're still enough and don't make any sudden moves, the puppy might even climb into your lap. Make the puppy come to you.

Incidentally, the word is "platonic".