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Originally Posted by Mondak
That was a truely professional way to interpret that. The nations news organizations would be proud of the way you completly ignored the point of what was being said and choose to use something totally out of context.
Thanks for helping me find a person whose opinions I should ignore.
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Allow me to go by this point by point.
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...that assumes that we view being selfish as bad. Let me tell you now, we had the kid for selfish reasons. We had the kid to enrich OUR lives. We didn't do it for the world or directly, even for him. It just so happens that we are rather comfortable in the concept of being selfish and doing things for ourselves. That does not mean being selfish has to hurt others in the process either.
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Meaningless statement
every decision you make in life is selfish. We make our choices in what gives us the most pleasure or the least pain. A saint is a saint because that is what makes them the most happy, likewise so dose the villain. As such there is nothing to see here.
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So the "why" question that makes the most sense to me is: will YOUR life be better after kid(s)?
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Meaningless as it will be impossible to answer until you have done it. You can not 'imagine' being a parent and have the same feelings you have as one. This has been described by many in this thread. To use my first example its like explaining what an orgasm feels like to a virgin.
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My previous advice was to go through everything that the choice will affect (which is pretty much everything there is...) and see where that puts you.
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Which is where my post comes in. Going through a list of tangibles to decide the value of an intangible is fruitless. Unless you understand what having a child is really like, you can't put up a balance sheet.
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Sometimes kids can put some distance between a couple temporarily as your emotional focus has to shift. Can everyone handle that? What activities do you like? If the answer is that your favorite thing to do is watch Barney on TV, then that might be a check in the right direction.
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And as you can see here my post was an obvious rebuttal of this. If you were trying to be sarcastic with the Barney line, you need to know that sarcasm doesn't work in text form. If you were serious then you musta liked Barney to have a kid based on your logic. As I rather doubt you like Barney, and yet you had a child, I'd have to ask why you even bothered putting something so ridiculous in your post.
So in conclusion, I don't care all that much what you think of me here. I'm concerned for Lurkette who I feel something of a bond with due to our past conversations. She seems to understand my posts, and thats what is important to me here here, not your opinion.