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Originally Posted by lurkette
Be brutally honest - does anyone here think that having children was a mistake? Do you know people who have had kids and wish they hadn't?
On the flip side, do you know people who have chosen not to have kids who regret it? Not like "wish I'd gone to Fiji instead of Cancun" sort of regret, but deep "my soul will never be complete now" regret?
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I have some good friends, my age, who are childless by circumstance, not choice and have simply accepted their fate and moved on. They have a fantastic relationship, do well-can afford vacations, food, etc.
I don't know if they lament not trying harder, though. They have never let on about it.
I don't know of anyone who regretted having their kids, although I'm pretty sure my sister-in-law should never have had kids (she has two boys); she's just not Mom material, although she loves her kids to death, she can be very cruel and biting toward them if they piss her off and would smack them on the head many times-something that just made my skin crawl. The boys are one year and 3 weeks apart, which hints at how much thinking she's done.
My ridiculous(to some) quest to have kids was that 'my soul will never be complete' feeling. I didn't follow protocols set in place by the fertility clinic; they said 7 treatments, I'd be back for the 8th, 9th, 10th. And I think that's the crux of the pursuit.
Like Charlatan said, everything here as reasons for and against is bunk. We base our suggestions on how we are responding to our own lifestyles. Ultimately, it must be your true desire that answers all your questions, whatever that desire is.