Siege

Start with body weight exercises. How many push ups can you do? Can you beat Kewpie_Dan?

If not, then start pushing

Seriously though, you can do a lot with what you have.

Push ups work your tris and chest, hand stand push ups work your tris and shoulders (try them, they're killer), 1 legged squats build your lower body, sit ups/crunches and planks work the core.

Those are just some examples, and all of them involve a body and a floor. Hopefully you have both

Start working and post results!

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"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"

--Kevin Smith

This part just makes my posts easier to find