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I abused my first girlfriend for about 2 years out of our 2 1/2 year relationship. I didn't realise what I was really doing at the time (I was 17). Basically I found out that the reason she was the way she was was because her brother had abused her. She was adopted and he never really accepted her and was jealous of the attention she took away from him so basically made her life hell, and he was the favoured son.
It was pretty horrible what I did. I guess I unwittlingly took on another persons entire life because I loved her and I wanted to fix her, and I ended up making her life a hell of a lot worse. I couldn't deal with not being able to fix her and the world and I took it out on her. Its weird to look back at something really horrible you have done - you have to accept that you didn't know any better at the time but you still have to live with the damage that you have caused. All I can say is that we both learned a hell of a lot for 17 year olds and I guess the emotional scars heal and leave you a better person.
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