Fools Rushmore In
In the premiere episode of the familiar but fun ''Treasure Hunters,'' the ten teams eventually find their way to America's most famous presidential monument by Michael Slezak
Who says charity is dead? Not me, certainly not after observing how the folks over at America's No. 1 network, CBS, were nice enough to lend one of their hit reality series to their struggling competitor NBC. Oh sure, the Peacock people added some surface-level Da Vinci Code flourishes, including a claim that the show's secrets are protected by ''a secret society'' — like who? General Electric? Matt, Ann, Al, and Meredith? the background cast of The Office? — but at the end of the day, Treasure Hunters might as well be called The Amazing Race: Summer Edition.
Which is not to say Treasure Hunters isn't an appealing slice of summer entertainment. It's just got some labeling issues — much like several of the 10 teams of three who've entered into this far-reaching scavenger hunt in the hopes of taking home some kind of prize that, at this point, we can only assume will be worth giving up several weeks of their lives — and, potentially, their anonymity and the respect of their family, friends, and coworkers.
Take, for example, ''the Geniuses,'' who, among the three of them, have ''nine majors and one master's we're all working on.'' As far as I'm concerned, that doesn't make them automatic MENSA members; it just means they're indecisive. And anyhow, if the team's leader, Francis, doesn't know enough to take a razor to his bizarre facial hair, how much is his IQ worth, anyway?
Then there's the little matter of the moniker bestowed on the ''Miss USA'' team, a trio of generic beauties who all, at one time or another, competed for the Miss USA crown — and lost! Now I'm not suggesting the trio be saddled with a label like ''Miss USA Losers'' or ''Not Miss USAs'' for the duration of Treasure Hunters' run (though that would be more accurate), but how about something like ''Team Pretty!'' or ''Pageant-bots''?
The only colorful, accurate ID on Treasure Hunters — aside from ''the Brown Family,'' which flashes on screen every time one of the show's two African-American teams pops up (perhaps as a homage to The Amazing Race: Family Edition's Black family) — is ''the Wild Hanlons,'' bestowed on a mulletastic Texas dad, his brother, and his son. Whether you choose to root for or against good ol' boys who aren't opposed to wearing T-shirts featuring a trucker-flap gal emblazoned with the colors of the American flag, you've got to admit they make for good TV, particularly Papa, who seemingly has no use for the codes and clues provided by the show's producers. Leaving the Nebraska state capital by bus, he chose to ignore the Jefferson-Washington-Lincoln clues that pointed to Mount Rushmore and instead reckoned the next stop was Colorado, ''because we're near it!'' Later, when pointed in the direction of Rushmore's presidential path, he instead chose to dig through garbage cans, look under rocks, then lead his brood into a small cave. Trust me, it's about as close to the Three Stooges as you're gonna find on current network television.
(On a side note, did any of you notice one of the Hanlons sporting an Ask.com T-shirt during the final leg of the episode? Not since Tyra Banks saddled her America's Next Top Model contestants with Tyra talk-show tops has needless product placement been so blatant and unattractive. What next? Dubbing the teams ''the Wild Hanlons: Sponsored by Ask.com''? or ''the Southies: Brought to You by Orbitz''? Wait. Scratch that. Let's not give NBC any more bad ideas.)
In spite of the corporate shilling, however, I'm already hooked on the show, thanks to its relatively zippy pacing, its variety of scenic settings (Must. Experience. Black-sand beaches), and the presence of a handful of teams I could grow to loathe.
I started actively rooting against the So-Called Geniuses the second that Francis, discussing his Treasure Hunters strategy, noted that ''it's almost as if you have to dumb yourself down, but it's hard to when you're really smart.'' These are the same guys who ignored their busmates' pleas to head to Rushmore, refused to admit their mistake after arriving at Roosevelt Mountain, and got out-thunk by the Hanlons on the final code cracking to wind up ninth at episode's end.
I've also decided to arbitrarily root against Miss USA (for heinously acknowledging their own cuteness within the series' first 30 minutes) and the Southie Boys (only because team member John speaks in stunningly bland sports analogies like ''Ultimately the team in first place is gonna win this treasure hunt.'' Like, duh!)
And then, of course, there's the Fogal family, minister Brad, his wife, Margie, and their daughter, Kayte. You knew these folks were going to be trouble the second dear old Dad stated, ''If there's a point where we have to stretch the truth a little bit and ask forgiveness later, I don't think we're beyond that,'' but when he broke the commandment about stealing to tear a clue out of poor Grad Student Kat's hapless hands, it was on, people! Add to it Mom's hooting and hollering in front of her struggling competitors after opening the airplane-wreckage boxes on that Hawaiian beach — nice use of the phrase ''do unto others'' — and I'm kinda wondering where I might be able to sign up for the Church of Play Now, Pray Later.
On the flip side, I've already formed positive first impressions of the Air Force alumni, the CIA folks, and the Brown family (mainly after Terrance observed about his brother that ''Keith is going to be the first person to drown in the ocean wearing a life vest.'')
I'm just hoping that in subsequent episodes, Treasure Hunters will be more willing to tease the brains of its players and its viewers with its Dan Brown-flavored cryptology. Challenges like the Jeffersonian cane-umbrella-key puzzle and the Lake George cairn dig were so random in their solutions that you had to wonder what happened to the Da Vinci angle. Meanwhile, having a group of five or six teams wind up around a pile of faux time capsules and utilize laptop computers to solve not-terribly-complex clues not only felt unfair but drained the proceedings of any suspense.
Better to employ odd twists, like that two-starting-points gimmick, if for no other reason than seeing the stunned expressions on the faces of the players. I particularly loved Ex-CIA member Jacob's priceless comment after coming face-to-face with the five teams he hadn't realized he was competing against: ''For maybe one second I think, 'This is a mirror.' '' Yeah, I guess if you're, um, Dracula and your own image doesn't typically appear in a mirror.
And if Treasure Hunters can legally ''borrow'' any more Amazing Race conceits, I'm hoping it'll allow for players to navigate their own vehicles (always a source of delicious intra-team tension) and set them on foreign soil (a surefire plan to incite amusing bouts of Ugly-Americanitis). Sure, according to most religious texts, the Treasure Hunters producers might be accused of stealing, but for folks so eager to get their Da Vinci Code on, everything's probably open to interpretation.
What did you think of the premiere of Treasure Hunters? Did you notice Kayte Fogal gasping when host Laird Macintosh noted at the outset that one team would be eliminated at the final checkpoint? And were you sad to see Justin Guarini, the hot chick from Battlestar Galactica, and their semi-mute friend get eliminated?
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So who watched this show?
I find this show to be a blatant rip-off of the Amazing Race.
I also found that the show seemed extremely scripted and staged at points. The scene where they all showed up in the Nebraska Capitol building? They all showed up at the exact same time!
The host, as one person put it on Jokers Updates, should be reading news at 2am - not hosting a reality show. That guy sounds like William Shatner!
That being said - I will watch the show. I hope that the editing will improve and they will slow down on the blatant site plugs (Ask.com t-shirts!), and stop repeating every clue or instruction 5 times.
What did you guys think?