Me over the baby, I would hope. My mother losr my father before I was born, and had to raise me by herself (before my stepdad came into the picture)... the trauma of that death will never leave her. They say losing a spouse is one of the highest stressors a person can ever experience; losing a child is obviously very hard, too, but I think the spouse one is even harder.
Say, if I had died, somehow, and my father had lived (obviously the events were unrelated), I think my mother might have been a lot more mentally stable than she is today. Then again, I wouldn't exist, but they might have had another child. So it goes.
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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran
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