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Originally Posted by abaya
Is it possible, though, that some people don't really lie to themselves, that not everyone needs to strip away all their bullshit? Are there some people who just don't HAVE bullshit piled up on them? I'd like to know.
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Not as far as I've ever been able to see, no. Near as I can tell, the one thing that all human beings are really, really good at is deluding themselves, and it's a universal part of the human condition. I'm not cynical about that in the slightest--I see it as the opportunity for real honesty with ourselves. I'm not actually convinced that we can be honest at all without first being honest about our lies. The most enlightened person in the world--the Dali Lama, say--is only that way because he has really gotten to the bottom of his self-delusion, and has really told the utter truth to himself, and then trained himself to stay honest.
Once you start listening to yourself speak, really watching for justification and explanation and hedging, you'll hear it all over the place--both in yourself and in others. None of that kind of talk leaves you with any power or freedom, it traps you into being the victim of something. Telling the truth about that puts YOU in the driver's seat of life. And it does mean taking responsibility for areas of your life that aren't working--it's not your mother's fault she didn't hug you enough, in other words. Nothing in your life is ANYBODY'S fault--including your own. But it is YOUR life, and it's going the way YOU are making it go.