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If your not interested in being a stable influence on both her and the kid, you should probly stay away. When I first met my new wife, the first thing she told me was that she had a daughter, and if we were going to be involved, I needed to know that she was the most important part of her life. Don't treat the child as just a hanger-on, a mom and kid are a package deal.
My first date with Candi was a kid's movie and dinner, and we almost always took our daughter when we went out.
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There are no absolute rules of conduct, either in peace or war. Everything depends on circumstances.
Leon Trotsky
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