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I'd shoot myself in the leg 'by accident.' While I'm pro-war, I personally am not made for it. I've never been athletic, and I assure you if you're being shot at you do NOT want me to be running with you because I'll slow the whole group down. Everyone is skilled at something, and I'd make a poor soldier.
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I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
Emo Philips
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