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Mantus · 06-04-2006, 07:08 AM

I am so glad you brought this up. I was at one point a prolific liar. I lived like 4 differnt lives among which created such a headache for me.

Lying about your life is a habit and lack of confidence in your identity.

Inherently there is nothing wrong with lying if it achieves a goal for you. Unfortunately most people use lies to achieve a goal that conflicts with the method of achieving it. If you wish to be greater then you are and thus more confident about yourself; then lying will only lower your self esteem because it re-enfornces your negative image of yourself. "I am such a loser, I have to exagerate my life..." as an example of a though I've had.

On the other hand if you lie to get something you wan't like...

"Oh...the glass broke in my hand...can I have another beer?" - when I actually dropped it
"Yah guys, I am from out of town, alone, and my friends are already inside, would you mind letting me go ahead cuz I'll have to leave soon" - to a bouncer when the line is 100 people long.

These lies don't create any cognitive dissonance and most of the time you don't have to keep track of them after the situation is over.

Like I said earlier. It's a habit. So break it. Learn to accept yourself for who you are. Do things that will make you feel better about yourself and discover that you can communicate on a conceptual and emotional level.

Radical Honesty by Brad Blaton is a decent book to read as well.

Cheers

06-04-2006, 07:08 AM	#3 (permalink)
Mantus lascivious	I am so glad you brought this up. I was at one point a prolific liar. I lived like 4 differnt lives among which created such a headache for me. Lying about your life is a habit and lack of confidence in your identity. Inherently there is nothing wrong with lying if it achieves a goal for you. Unfortunately most people use lies to achieve a goal that conflicts with the method of achieving it. If you wish to be greater then you are and thus more confident about yourself; then lying will only lower your self esteem because it re-enfornces your negative image of yourself. "I am such a loser, I have to exagerate my life..." as an example of a though I've had. On the other hand if you lie to get something you wan't like... "Oh...the glass broke in my hand...can I have another beer?" - when I actually dropped it "Yah guys, I am from out of town, alone, and my friends are already inside, would you mind letting me go ahead cuz I'll have to leave soon" - to a bouncer when the line is 100 people long. These lies don't create any cognitive dissonance and most of the time you don't have to keep track of them after the situation is over. Like I said earlier. It's a habit. So break it. Learn to accept yourself for who you are. Do things that will make you feel better about yourself and discover that you can communicate on a conceptual and emotional level. Radical Honesty by Brad Blaton is a decent book to read as well. Cheers Last edited by Mantus; 06-04-2006 at 07:11 AM..