ChadB

Hi, I wasn't sure where this post should go.

My wife and I have been married for 17 years (since we were 19). The last 9 years have not been so good. I was focusing on my career, depressed, and was very distant from her and the kids (2 girls). Earlier this year we talked about getting a divorce. At first I was fine with it but then one night 3 weeks ago it was like I got a wake up call. I could finally see what I was losing and who I was hurting. This was my best friend and lover what on earth was I doing?!? I told her I wanted to try and work it out and I completely changed my life and personality. We are seeing a marriage counselor now but I fear it may be too late. She says I'm now being the man she always wished I would have been but we have so much history she doesn't think she can get her love for me back. I'm desperate to get us back together and make the rest of our life as it should be, happy. I owe her more happiness than I can ever pay back but I want to try anyway. She currently doesn't like me to hug or kiss her, she says she isn't ready for that. I've tried everything to show her my love, sending flowers, sharing the load of the daily tasks, encouraging her career achievements, scheduling getaway family weekends, and just plain telling her I love her (which she says she doesn't believe yet). I don't know what else to do. I guess it just takes time but I'm in a state of panic. I can't work or sleep thinking about it. I just want to scoop her up and hug her as hard as I can, saying, "I'm sorry" endlessly.

If anyone out there has any suggestions on how to help mend this great wound I've caused please reply. Ladies and you give me some insight?

Thank you