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Originally Posted by red0blivia
personally, i don't believe in the institution of marriage. it is an archaic ceremony based in the transfer of property (the bride) from the father to the husband - nothing more.
and it makes me want to vomit when i hear people exchange the more traditional vows "to honour and obey"
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Jen and I took out the three offending parts of the vows.
1. Obey was taken out. Most all people who do the weddings will graciously alter the text for you and they might slightly stumble through your new vows, but we chose a non-religious person to marry us and she did a good job reading our vows to us that we edited.
2. "To have and to hold from this day forward" is also part of the historical property tradition that you speak of. We took that out. We added some other loving things in it's place. I think we changed it to "To love, respect, and laugh with from this day forward." *smile*
3. Since my wife and I had an open relationship before we got married (we are both bi), we chose to remove the part "To forsake all others". I can't remember what we put in its place, but something about family.
Government does not legislate what is spoken at a wedding. Some religions won't allow you to edit the vows however.
All government and institutions of religion can be reformed to be better every generation. Rejecting 100% of something just because one part of it is rotten is like tossing out an apple just because of one small blemish on one side.
I personally favor goverment documenting weddings and unions because I am a fan of family tree and geneology searching. Without government archives, then I would have a very difficult time tracing my family tree and history. Some of the government archives have kept medical and social history on my family tree and saved it in fire proof buildings. (One is here in Seattle) Some of my family in generations past have had fires in their homes and lost all family tree info. Without the government saving that info for me, it would be lost permanently and long lost cousins would be reunited at our family reunions we have in the summer.
The census also helps in many ways by documenting how society is changing by documenting weddings, unions, and other data. Yes, sometimes government gets crazy about data gathering and wire tapping, but reform is a good option instead of rejecting it. Sometimes it take many generations for government to reform however. (^:
Jonathan