Originally Posted by BigBen

Talking Dirty Script, by BigBen:

For the purposes of this document, I will refer to the consenting adults as 1 and 2, so as not to limit the event with gender bias. Please remember, this is a template only, and needs to be completed with the personal info before talking commences:

1: Ooooh, baby, your tasty, tasty, iced cream sundae is what I have been dreaming about all day.

2: You want my lunch money? I'll give it to you if you want it real bad.

1: I just need your potatoes seasoned with garlic inside me. My mouth is so dry; I can't take it any more! Just hand me over the pitcher of beer and drink with me me already!

2: Alright, just hold on. My dad isn't home yet. Why don't you make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while we wait for my dad to get going?

1: We always fight. I am tired of fighting all the time. Maybe you could support me on my opinions.

2: What? Where did you hear about that? That is just ridiculous. You really are a pain sometimes, you know that? All I want once in a while is a nice hard crunchy snack, and you keep harping all the time about vitamins and nutritional facts.

1: That is it. I've had it. I am phoning your mother. At least she will know how to listen to me.

2: Oh, you just had to bring up Canada again, huh? Well you know what? I hope you have a wonderful time in the provinces until you both want to return home with the goddamned news cameras filming the whole thing.