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What you want to do is drop the "I'm not looking for anything serious" or "I don't want to settle down" etc. on the third date. You don't want to wait too long or you'll have a possibility of wasting her time and pissing her off.
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"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand)
"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)
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