Or, "My Happy Easter Weekend"
So I enjoyed paintball for the first time ever last Saturday, and I'm still recovering...I'm bruised to heck and back--thank goodness for dermablend! Uhh, that's a heavy-duty make-up especially for covering up bruises, birthmarks, and the like. I invested in some after I returned from Egypt, my legs looked like hell. And invested is the right word, it ain't cheap. And I'll be applying it liberally for tomorrow night's burly show!
I have another invitation to play paintball at the end of the month, but I'm not crazy about a hobby that marks me up so badly, I take forever to heal bruises although I have a bruise balm I'm been applying several times a day. But I have to confess that shooting the place up (with paintballs) is pretty satisfying. *And* it also gives a very mild glimpse into what it must be like on a real battlefield.
But one very exciting aspect of the weekend's paintball activities is that I almost got bit by a rattlesnake. We were playing on an outdoor field, and here I am all day, flinging myself into foxholes and army-crawling and getting dirty as heck, when I ran up to hide behind some barrier (fortunately didn't fling myself on the ground behind it). I crouched, searching for a clear shot at the "president" or her "bodyguards" in the gutted bus that hosted this scenario, when I heard tat---tat-rattattatatatatat! I froze, and thought (in less than a nanosecond), "I've never heard that noise before, and yet I know *exactly* what it is!"
The frustrating thing is that paintball masks protrude from your face like a snout just under your eyes, so you can't see directly downward easily. So I leap up and start doing a little hopping dance with my head tucked down at an awkward angle trying to look down, praying I don't land on it. Of course when I stand up, I start getting shot at by the other players! But honestly, I didn't really notice just then. Finally the snake moved away where I could see it--it was a baby, *maybe* a foot long, and real skinny. However, it's the baby rattlesnakes that are more dangerous, because they dump all their poison reserves when they bite, not knowing how to control it yet. It coiled up in a tiny little pile--not completely, so I knew it wasn't preparing to strike--and turned it's head around and watched me, absolutely motionless.
Fortunately I am not innately afraid of snakes. So I calmly backed away far enough so it couldn't launch itself at me even if it wanted to, while thinking...Why didn't I wear boots?!? I just waited the rest of the game out there watching it, not wanting anyone else to take cover there. At the end everyone exited the field, even the snake (sportsmanlike!). Everything worked exactly the way it was supposed to, I got too close, it gave warning, I moved away, the snake didn't bite me...it's all great! Imagine if I lived in India, cobras don't give nearly as clear a warning as rattlers.
I was just glad to see it wasn't a Mojave Green, those are way deadly. All other snake toxins are either a hemotoxin, or a neurotoxin. But Mojave Greens (which are very common out here) have both hemo- and neuro- toxin in their venom, making them very much more dangerous than your average poisonous snake.
I just think it's way cool that when folks ask me how my Easter weekend went, I can tell them I got shot at, and nearly snake-bitten. How was yours?