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Originally Posted by willravel
Ah, I misunderstood. Yes, I would say that's a form of torture. I once dated a woman who had only dated black guys up until she dated me. She would go on and on about how I was different than black guys (I'm white as snow in look, speech, and pretty much everything else). It rubbed me the wrong way until I realized something: this girl went on about how she liked things that I wasn't, but she was with me. That realiziation, while a bit dry, did make me feel better. I know it sounds bad, but she liked me inspite of the fact that I was white. She liked other parts of me so much, she was able to put aside something that I think she saw as a flaw just so she could be with those other parts (and I don't mean that as an inuendo). That says something.
I know it seems cold, but think aobut how much your SO feels for you. Yes, there may be cosmetic imperfections -beauty is in the eye of the beholder, after all- but your SO has feelings for you that are deeper.
I'm not saying you aren't justified in being hurt. I'd say you are justified, and you probably should say something...just bear in mind that there is more to life than breasts in your SO's mind.
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I've gone for a surgical consult to get info on getting breast implants and what's most telling/amusing is his reaction. Telling me I don't need to do this, my breasts are the perfect size for my body size etc, then he says "if you do this guys will be all over you"
Bingo...l if I'm small busted in his mind it's good because it means no other man will give me a second look, Lol, I responded by asking him "if you openly enjoy ogling busty young women, why is it wrong for me to wish to be the object of those same admiring glances from men ?Why would it bother you if other men notice me in the same way you notice other women"
Haven't gotten an answer to that question yet
Btw, being wanted for your personality and the cools things you do for others is very important but feeling physically desired is important too. Having to feel like I'm being somehow forgiven for a "flaw" that I had no control over somehow does nothing to inspire confidence/desire in me.
I myself have very few strong physical preferences in men but decided long ago that those few I do have need to be respected and that it's a lot kinder to just pass on men who don't possess those traits. To take somebody as they are but then basically keep letting em know they aren't what you usually like is imho really destructive .