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Originally Posted by ASU2003
I think the brain chemicals and memories are why we seek out and remain in relationships. Love is just another reaction in our brain that makes us feel good. And in my limited experience, there are many 'the ones', that I would be happy with. There might be 'the BEST one' or 'the PERFECT one' out there someplace, but there is no way there would be as many relationships if everyone had to find 'the only one' for them.
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If the assumption is that *all* things we feel (not just love) are chemical reactions firing off, and that love is just another type of that... okay, I can go with that. (I don't particularly think about chemicals reacting when I'm enjoying my partner's presence, and in fact I *do* think love is the closest form of spirituality/the unknown that most of us can ever experience... but I can go along with the chemical stuff as a premise for now.)
I certainly agree with you that there is no One person out there for each person... there are many possible Ones, or for those who are polyamorous, there are a multiplicity of Ones all at the same time. But some of us do want to invest our energy in one, or a few, people... and then the question becomes, how to sustain that particular bond so that it remains positive and fulfilling for as many years as possible?
I suppose my intent in the OP was to ask if the TFP if those initial chemical reactions of lust/infatuation (using your model) could indeed be resurrected over and over again, with the same person(s), by instilling a kind of habit in one's acts of love. I don't mean "habit" in a bad way, but perhaps if we use the chemical reaction analogy... that we want our brains to get into the habit that is most pleasing to us and our partner(s), which is to program ourselves a bit into a loving "schedule" that maximizes both our chance of happiness.
But now I feel like a biologist or an economist, of which I am neither.
