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Old 04-20-2003, 08:58 PM   #1 (permalink)
clavus
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Location: NorCal
Insano Arizona Toilet

This is a special shout out to the person who is responsible for the toilets at Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport. Please, recalibrate the auto-flush sensors. I was trying to lighten my load on one of your fine, high-tech porcelain beauties last week. Every time I shifted position the dang thing flushed.

I’m sure you are aware that you have the flushing mechanism set all the way to the max; and normally this is a good thing. We both know what a bummer it is to find leftovers in the bowl. Your plumbing masterpieces are serious, industrial-grade machines. You should be proud of them, because when they flush, they FLUSH. It’s a raging torrent of wind and water down there, and I’m sure it does a Hell of a job.

But when I was sitting on it, every time I so much as breathed the thing went off. That hurricane-force flush is rather unpleasant when it’s raging almost nonstop just below my crotch.

Seriously, it was like a toilet-bowl version of A Perfect Storm and my balls were playing the part of the Andrea Gail.
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