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Anyone who has read my journal knows I got this lovely phone call on Monday. She's in Italy and fooled around with a visitor from home when we were fighting. I don't really think there is any blanket statement about what to do about cheating that works, it's so situational and depends so much on the people involved. For some couples, I imagine cheating is the final or only straw, for others it's something that can be worked past.
Personally? I believe people can change, if they want to. For this reason I don't think a cheater should be written off outright. I think that it depends on the reason they're cheating and whether or not they are genuinely sorry and will ever do it again. I'm not going to say it's not going to hurt, and it's not going to change things, it certainly will. But it isn't something you can't work through and come out for the better on the other side.
I think the best advice you can give your friend is to be honest with themselves and be honest with their SO. Lay it all out, don't hold anything back, the only way to work through something like this is if both parties are totally open and honest. If they want to save the relationship this is the only way it's going to happen. Anything that doesn't come out now will later and certainly be the end then.
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The advantage law is the best law in rugby, because it lets you ignore all the others for the good of the game.
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