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Originally Posted by Siege
Well, on the flip side, maybe there is something they need to change to MEET women. I know some guys that don't speak to any females outside of their circle of friends, or people introduced to them. Depending on how often they are introduced to females, this can range from very little, to a small amount.
As for the universal traits, i'm not a big fan of how they make it sound like all women are the same either. While i'm willing to go as far as to say perhaps a fair amount of women will now be more attracted to you, saying that all of them will is just silly.
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I wouldn't go as far as claiming that developing this or that trait, or following this or that method, will make all women fall in love with a guy or drop on their knees for him, but if there was any moderate amount of interest to begin with and the guy doesn't come off as needy and desperate (as was my case back in the days) then it increases the odds of him keeping the woman interested long enough to get to know him and increase her interest in him.
I think one reason all those "relationship pros" and "love doctors" have a market for selling their material is because many guys acquire erroneous notions when it comes to dealing with women and relationships. Allow me to explain myself further:
For example, I was always told that if I liked a girl I should let her know how I feel about her and that I should shower her with compliments. What I was not told was that too many compliments too soon will turn a woman off, so I ended up making a fool of myself more often than not. If instead I had been advised to express how I feel towards a woman through subtle actions instead of words, and if I'd been told that a little mystery keeps a woman from being bored then I wouldn't have shot myself in the proverbial foot so many times as I did in my youth.
Yes those inviduals selling advice on relationships are just charging for knowledge that should be common sense, but the point is that too many men have to learn those lessons through the bitter curriculum of the University of Hard Knocks instead of benefiting from good advice from friends and parents. If fathers explaind to young men that they should go in very slowly when attempting to start a relationship with a woman and that they should not rush to spill all their guts out then a lot of guys would enjoy more success with women. Also, if young men were taught by their fathers, uncles, and cousins to pay attention to how a woman acts towards them rather than focus on how much they like the girl, then a lot of young men would seek relationships with women who are more receptive to the idea of a relationship with them rather than waste their time and effort trying to seduce a woman who isn't the least bit interested in them. If young men were taught that they must be at least moderately pleasing to a woman's eyes before she'll consider dating them then many would not waste their time trying to convince women to grow feelings for them through their sense of humor and sensitivity when a woman who's actually attracted to them to begin with would be a whole helluva lot more receptive to those same qualities of humor and sensitivity because there's already an attraction there.
In short, those "experts" on love and relationships have a wide open market to exploit because the common sense they're selling to their readers is often only acquired by the average guy after years of painful lessons and after having had their hearts shot to a million pieces. Let's face it, ladies and gentlemen of TFP... when it comes to relationships, some guys are very sharp and have a good innate sense of how to proceed with women and how not to mess up; but there are some guys (like myself) who are totally clueless or very dense so they have to go through several (too many, as far as I'm concerned) painful lessons that they need not have experienced if they'd been taught properly.
Have you ever considered that maybe the reason those self-help books on relationships sell not because of what is being said in them but because the information is presented in a way that finally 'clicks' in the reader's mind?