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Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
If it's God's will then it will happen on it's own, and via free will you can make appropriate choices. Self-will is manipulating the results to that which benefits you most.
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I am going to refrain from derailing this thread into another debate about the logic of these types of statements.
Instead, what's the harm in him asking, if only just once? I only have anecdotal evidence, but I've come under the impression that a lot of people (although it's been said about females specifically) will not "jump ship" until another one comes along to hop onto. He's not necessarily being a homewrecker by finding out how she feels.