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Originally Posted by match000
So... I don't get it ladies. You say you can be 'yourself' and 100% be friends with men who are taken. You don't feel as 'safe' with single men.
Then how the heck are single men supposed to just be friends with women? It seems almost as if women arent interested in being friends with single men, cuz you can't 'let loose' and talk about 'anything'...
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This is a self-perpetuating situation. No woman will take the risk of being 'too' open with a guy, because experience has taught her that he WILL misinterpret her intentions, and end up acting like a total horn-dog. This is not 100% accurate, as there are some of us out there that have self-control, and can seperate love from sex, butr it is true enough for most women.
Most guys don't even bother telling a woman that 'i just wanna be friends' for 3 reasons:
1) ALL guys try to come off as the friends-first guy, even if they are a total horn-dog. And who wants to be that guy. I mean really.
2) Some women will see that kind of declaration as a tacit rejection of thier sexuality/identity.
3) It makes subsequent sexual attraction very akward.
Also, this dynamic becomes less relevant as you get older. the 18-25 set is VERY sensitive to the whole single-and-looking Vs TAKEN spectrum, but age gives men a certain amount of self control, (Hormones are on the decline) and as a result, women expect thier behavior to be...less desperate, for lack of a better way to articulate it. As a result, they are more open....but not until all parties concerned are out of the raging 20's!