Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

ClostGoth · 03-13-2006, 07:42 AM

How do you see yourself in the mirror when you look into it?
I have the worst body image of any woman I know. I just do NOT have a realistic idea of what my own body looks like, and I've never been able to look into a mirror without hating what I see.

Why do you think the bar is set so incredibly high for women?
Honestly, I think we set it ourselves for the most part. It's based on how we allow feedback from those around us to effect our self image, how we view those in the media, and probably a host of other factors going back to infancy in each of us! IMO, anyway.

And can women really live up to this? (some women seem too and they seem so successful)
No, I don't think so. I think we all find our own peace with the issue in one way or another. If you see someone whom you believe to be the epitome of everything a woman should be you'd be surprised at how she views herself. Have you ever heard an interview with a super model or actress who expresses surprise and wonder that anyone would find her worth viewing on the big screen? I have. And someone I felt was particularly perfect, too. :-)

Is anyone here actually living up to this image of the in control and perfectly styled professional women? (I’d like to know how!)
Personally, I'd rather like to know how to stop worrying about it. I'm tired of hating myself. I've been trying to be other people's ideas of what I should be for so long that I don't know who _I_ am any more...

How many of you are generally happy with the way you are present yourself physically, professionally?
Not me!

Now the posts from the men were incredibly interesting. I've heard those views expressed before, and I have no idea why it's so hard to believe them. I don't mind my DH participating in the cultural phenomenon called porn. I don't mind participating with him on occasion if he so desires. I have admitted to myself that the thing about it that bothers me most is jealousy. Not that I be more like the ladies on the screen/in mags/whatever, but that he prefers to spend time with them. I think that reflects negatively in my own self image. If I were pretty enough, smart enough, sexy enough... If my boobs were bigger, smaller, whatever... If my hips were smaller, if my waist was smaller... All these reasons why he would be more interested in me and less interested in THEM if I were more like them. I think we all just need to hear that we're beautiful the way we are. Repeatedly and from many different sources!! ;-) We want to know how our significant others feel about us, and it's nice to hear how they see us on occasion too. It surprises me, every time I hear it, that my husband finds me appealing in any way. Because I certainly don't find myself to be so.

03-13-2006, 07:42 AM	#57 (permalink)
ClostGoth Crazy Location: Omaha, NE	How do you see yourself in the mirror when you look into it? I have the worst body image of any woman I know. I just do NOT have a realistic idea of what my own body looks like, and I've never been able to look into a mirror without hating what I see. Why do you think the bar is set so incredibly high for women? Honestly, I think we set it ourselves for the most part. It's based on how we allow feedback from those around us to effect our self image, how we view those in the media, and probably a host of other factors going back to infancy in each of us! IMO, anyway. And can women really live up to this? (some women seem too and they seem so successful) No, I don't think so. I think we all find our own peace with the issue in one way or another. If you see someone whom you believe to be the epitome of everything a woman should be you'd be surprised at how she views herself. Have you ever heard an interview with a super model or actress who expresses surprise and wonder that anyone would find her worth viewing on the big screen? I have. And someone I felt was particularly perfect, too. :-) Is anyone here actually living up to this image of the in control and perfectly styled professional women? (I’d like to know how!) Personally, I'd rather like to know how to stop worrying about it. I'm tired of hating myself. I've been trying to be other people's ideas of what I should be for so long that I don't know who _I_ am any more... How many of you are generally happy with the way you are present yourself physically, professionally? Not me! Now the posts from the men were incredibly interesting. I've heard those views expressed before, and I have no idea why it's so hard to believe them. I don't mind my DH participating in the cultural phenomenon called porn. I don't mind participating with him on occasion if he so desires. I have admitted to myself that the thing about it that bothers me most is jealousy. Not that I be more like the ladies on the screen/in mags/whatever, but that he prefers to spend time with them. I think that reflects negatively in my own self image. If I were pretty enough, smart enough, sexy enough... If my boobs were bigger, smaller, whatever... If my hips were smaller, if my waist was smaller... All these reasons why he would be more interested in me and less interested in THEM if I were more like them. I think we all just need to hear that we're beautiful the way we are. Repeatedly and from many different sources!! ;-) We want to know how our significant others feel about us, and it's nice to hear how they see us on occasion too. It surprises me, every time I hear it, that my husband finds me appealing in any way. Because I certainly don't find myself to be so.