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Originally Posted by Ustwo
Love, sex, and relationships are in themselves not always related.
I think sleeping around is not a bad thing as it makes the sex part less of an issue. Sex itself can make you do stupid things and cloud your judgement. Once you have experianced enough sex that the 'wonder' is gone you can focus on what really matters for a long term relationship which is personality.
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Very good words, Ustwo. The trend, of course, seems to be that very few of the younger generation take the long term into consideration. I'd like to think I'm one of the exceptions to that rule. Granted, everyone has the ability to make their relationships meaningful and smooth regardless of the path they choose. When I originally was first interested in the girl who I love now, I made absolutely certain to look for the things that I wanted in a significant other. But she almost broke my heart (and confused the hell out of me!) when she turned me down (I later found out she had a recent bad breakup), and then summer came and I didn't see her the entire time. Then when school was back in, one of my friends brought her to our house after a bar night. I'm not sure why I wasn't out with them, but over the next number of weeks we hung out more and eventually we just got together. And this was totally free of any BS and gameplaying, I was just being myself! I'd like to think it was somehow meant to workout this way. On the other hand, I'm sure her previous relationship had a large effect on how she viewed me as a person, which is a clear example of the experience side of this thread. Perhaps this only further proves that things can work out in either situation, especially since a girl, who is 1 and a half years older, starts going out with a guy with no previous relationship experience. How's that for breaking the stereotypes?
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Originally Posted by SecretMethod70
This (the first part) is actually something I definitely disagree with. The second part is the key to this disagreement. Hard work and communication is absolutely necessary for long term relationships. It is a lack of that which leads to the feeling that one is "missing" something. I am in a relationship of a little over 6 years with onodrim and I am the only person she has ever dated, yet she has no feelings of having missed out on anything. The reason for this is because we have good communication and she is quite happy with me, and I am also happy with her. It is when unhappines with the relationship rears it's head that this feeling of having "missed out" is most likely to come up.
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The communication issue is always gonna huge as far as relationship are concerned. I'm currently long distancing and only seeing my SO about once a month, and I think communication is even more important in such circumstances. It's something that we all have to work on in our relationships...I've seen too many people be surprized and hurt by a lack of it in the past.