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ngdawg · 03-02-2006, 06:05 AM

Everyone goes through cycles of highs and lows, some very high, some extremely low. I tend to think of the lower times as the beginnings of yet another shedding of the skin, ala snakes. I have conversations with myself, trying to figure out why I am feeling that way and as I do, new revelations emerge, then finally, decisions and relief.
If we were euphoric every moment, how would we know? If we were depressed every waking day, how would we know what being happy is? These are the yins and yangs of life.
The simplest but probably most significant comforting thought in periods of darkness is this: Whether the number is 3 or 103, there are people in my life that love me, care about me and are glad to have me in their lives. I may put them on hold or even frustrate the hell out of them when I sink, but they've never abandoned me because of it. This alone not only embraces me and helps to lift me, but gives me the understanding of their yins and yangs and the realization that none of us is immune to the everchanging evolution of the psyche.
Never stop exploring yourself. Never stop learning about yourself and the world in which you live. There are still first-time wonders even for the old and grey. For days I watched a solitary black squirrel living behind the school I was attending. NJ doesn't have black squirrels-he must have been a pet, now abandoned or maybe hitched a ride in a U-Haul. Other squirrels would chase him away, squealing at him, yet he kept coming back. It was a source of amusement for a couple of weeks until I finally didn't see him any more.
I've lived in this area for over 25 years and for the first time just last month, even passing the same building day after day, I noticed things I'd never noticed before and, with camera in hand, went back to explore the property. The history, the ruins, the architecture, the sadness of what once was-it was all new to me yet had been there for over 100 years and been just a site to my right for a quarter century.
Evolving, learning, seeing with new eyes-the wonders of a child's experience never really leaves us at all. We have our memories, and we have the ability to make new ones with the same sense of wonder and exploration, if we just keep ourselves open to it. We have to ability to love over and over in many different ways, still loving who has passed through and adding new love if we allow it.
It is not the walls of others that keep us back, but the walls we build around ourselves.

03-02-2006, 06:05 AM	#3 (permalink)
ngdawg peekaboo Location: on the back, bitch	Everyone goes through cycles of highs and lows, some very high, some extremely low. I tend to think of the lower times as the beginnings of yet another shedding of the skin, ala snakes. I have conversations with myself, trying to figure out why I am feeling that way and as I do, new revelations emerge, then finally, decisions and relief. If we were euphoric every moment, how would we know? If we were depressed every waking day, how would we know what being happy is? These are the yins and yangs of life. The simplest but probably most significant comforting thought in periods of darkness is this: Whether the number is 3 or 103, there are people in my life that love me, care about me and are glad to have me in their lives. I may put them on hold or even frustrate the hell out of them when I sink, but they've never abandoned me because of it. This alone not only embraces me and helps to lift me, but gives me the understanding of their yins and yangs and the realization that none of us is immune to the everchanging evolution of the psyche. Never stop exploring yourself. Never stop learning about yourself and the world in which you live. There are still first-time wonders even for the old and grey. For days I watched a solitary black squirrel living behind the school I was attending. NJ doesn't have black squirrels-he must have been a pet, now abandoned or maybe hitched a ride in a U-Haul. Other squirrels would chase him away, squealing at him, yet he kept coming back. It was a source of amusement for a couple of weeks until I finally didn't see him any more. I've lived in this area for over 25 years and for the first time just last month, even passing the same building day after day, I noticed things I'd never noticed before and, with camera in hand, went back to explore the property. The history, the ruins, the architecture, the sadness of what once was-it was all new to me yet had been there for over 100 years and been just a site to my right for a quarter century. Evolving, learning, seeing with new eyes-the wonders of a child's experience never really leaves us at all. We have our memories, and we have the ability to make new ones with the same sense of wonder and exploration, if we just keep ourselves open to it. We have to ability to love over and over in many different ways, still loving who has passed through and adding new love if we allow it. It is not the walls of others that keep us back, but the walls we build around ourselves. __________________ Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.