zharvey

This morning I had to get to the hospital to do some testing and I got lost (bad directions). I've been bummed out for the last week or so because of a lot of problems I've been having - everything from work to my girlfriend, health, money, etc.

So I stopped in a mobil station to ask for directions and behind the counter looked like what literally appeared to be an eight-year old boy. He was so small he had to stand on a chair just to be at eye height with the customers. His named tag read "Mike - 20 Years Old". He must have some disease that prevents his body from growing or aging like it should. He looks so young and out of place that the management obviously made him wear his age on his name tag, which can't be a great morale boost. He looked miserable and humiliated, as if he would choose to be in any other place than that gas station just then.

The guy in front of me in line must have been a regular customer, because he obviously had a rapport with the kid. "How's it going today Mikey?" he asked, and I swear to God the kid locked eyes with me (we're about the same age) and with the most painful, angry, envious stare answered the other customer wth "eh, I'm still here." - All the while keeping his eyes locked on me. As he did this, his face turned beet red and his eyes welled up a little. I know this sounds so cheesy but it was like all of the sudden in the two or three seconds he was looking at me like this, I caught a slight glimpse as to what his life was like and I've never felt worse or so sad in many years.

I used to have a friend Rob who was my age and paralyzed from the waist down. When he was 2 years old his mom got into a car accident with him in the back seat and it broke his neck leaving him permanently crippled. He had such a strong outlook and disposition in life, but then one night we all got drunk and the kid just broke down into a mess. He told all of us that growing up he never had many friends in school because all the kids pitied him and were scared to get close to him, and how people were embarassed to be his friend because he was in a wheel chair. He had never had a girlfriend, nor sex, not even the slightest hint of female affection other than from his mom and sister in 19 years. He kept crying that night wishing that he was just dead, and when this Mikey kid looked at me today, I saw the same pain and hate that was in Rob's face all those years ago.

Walking out of the mobil store, I felt so ashamed that I had actually been bitching and upset about my problems, which although are significant, pale in comparison to the loneliness that this kid and so many other people have to live their whole lives with.

Today was a moment of clarity for me, and I was just wondering if anybody else had experienced the same "epiphany."

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"Forty-three species of parrot? Nipples for men?? SLUGS!! God created slugs?!? I mean, are we not in the hands of a complete lunatic? If I had had my way, we would have started with laser beams, 8 o'clock, Day 1." -Evil