In a simple response to the OP: No. I don't think love is a limited resource, and I go even further with the belief that love begets love, as others have already said in this thread. That said, I have some other questions to throw out here, and I hope this doesn't become an unwanted threadjack.
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Originally Posted by onesnowyowl
Secondly, I don't think having a deep love for someone in a secondary relationship would or should interfere with a deep love in a primary relationship--if the partners in the primary relationship are really in love with one another, then they are fully understanding of the other's heart and what it is capable of.
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Primary and secondary relationships. This gets me thinking of polyamory (something I already think about a lot) in a new way. What about polyamorous relationships where everyone is equally ..close/committed/important.. (for lack of a single or better word). Equally equal. More than two people and all sub-relationships are considered primary. Does this even exist? What then? How can this come to be? If you can have a meaningful relationship and/or love with more than one person without detracting from the same with the other(s), wouldn't it almost be desireable to have all of the love be primary as long as everybody involved can get past the precedence fears and feelings of left-outness (as ratbastid calls it)? When I envision myself in a situation like this, an obstacle I can easily see cropping up emotional exhaustion. I definitely think headspace and love are completely different things and, to me, headspace seems unquestionably to be a limited resource.
Has anybody here who is in a polyamorous situation that is primary-secondary in nature thought about evolving into an "all-primary" situation as I've suggested? If so, what keeps you from letting a secondary relationship become primary as well - is it because there is less potential for the closeness/love with the secondary person(s) than there is with the primary person(s), or is it because there is some other kind of practical complication or roadblock such as a pre-existing marriage (or equivalent emotional commitment) with the primary person(s)?
I realize I could be talking to no one here, and also that it could sound like I'm directing this at specific people... I hope it's not the former and I'll say for the record that it's not the latter. I just have all these questions that were swimming around in my head before this thread even came into existence. If anybody here could address any of these with personal experience, I would be much obliged. On the other hand, I also hope that there are other people around here who don't have experience with this to join me in asking questions I haven't already asked.