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I used to date a girl who ditched me after I spent hundreds of dollars on her because I wasn't "smooth".
Fuck that. I'm suave.
I proved that to my mom last night.
I was set to go out with this one girl, just a friend, and I was wearing khaki pants at the time, and my mother suggested I change my clothes cuz I wouldn't want popcorn grease stains on such nice pantalones.
I quickly explained to my mom that while at the drive-in movie theater, the girl and I would not be wearing any pants.
My mom soundly beat me a dozen times with a pillow.
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"Asking a bomb squad if an old bomb is still "real" is not the best thing to do if you want to save it." - denim
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