Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

Martian · 02-18-2006, 06:20 PM

The trick is to seperate the concept of introversion from the concept of being socially awkward. I am most definitely the former; I have few close friends, although there are a lot of people I would term acquaintances. I am not, however, the latter. I know the rules, I know my strengths and in the occasional situation where I'm not confident I can usually fake it really well anyway.

My question was meant to get you thinking. I don't consider change to be good or bad, except on the individual level. If you truly believe that this will contribute to your happiness and well-being, you have my full support. I just wanted you to make sure that you do believe that. That you're not doing it because your girlfriend wants you to or your friends expect you to.

In terms of specific introductions, it's a formality that has lapsed recently. I do always make introductions, but I'm also anachronistic in a lot of ways; most people don't anymore. In that situation, you're usually best off to do it yourself. Nobody will ever get upset with you for introducing yourself. Step forward, say 'hi, I'm...' and offer your hand or do whatever it is people do in your social circles.

Online chat is an excellent way to get a good handle on social conventions for two reasons. The first is that it's more relaxed in general and aside from that, you have time to consider your responses and formulate them in whatever way you deem appropriate.

One further piece of advice: cultivate a sense of humour if you don't have one already. What I mean by that is that you should learn how to fire off a one-liner or quip where appropriate. It's a very useful skill; if you can handle it, in the situation where you do make a social gaffe, you can remedy it with a bit of deftly applied humour. This is a technique that's served me well in nearly all areas of life.

02-18-2006, 06:20 PM	#34 (permalink)
Martian Young Crumudgeon Location: Canada	The trick is to seperate the concept of introversion from the concept of being socially awkward. I am most definitely the former; I have few close friends, although there are a lot of people I would term acquaintances. I am not, however, the latter. I know the rules, I know my strengths and in the occasional situation where I'm not confident I can usually fake it really well anyway. My question was meant to get you thinking. I don't consider change to be good or bad, except on the individual level. If you truly believe that this will contribute to your happiness and well-being, you have my full support. I just wanted you to make sure that you do believe that. That you're not doing it because your girlfriend wants you to or your friends expect you to. In terms of specific introductions, it's a formality that has lapsed recently. I do always make introductions, but I'm also anachronistic in a lot of ways; most people don't anymore. In that situation, you're usually best off to do it yourself. Nobody will ever get upset with you for introducing yourself. Step forward, say 'hi, I'm...' and offer your hand or do whatever it is people do in your social circles. Online chat is an excellent way to get a good handle on social conventions for two reasons. The first is that it's more relaxed in general and aside from that, you have time to consider your responses and formulate them in whatever way you deem appropriate. One further piece of advice: cultivate a sense of humour if you don't have one already. What I mean by that is that you should learn how to fire off a one-liner or quip where appropriate. It's a very useful skill; if you can handle it, in the situation where you do make a social gaffe, you can remedy it with a bit of deftly applied humour. This is a technique that's served me well in nearly all areas of life. __________________ I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said - Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame