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It may not be abuse now, but he is definitely crossing your boundaries and doesn't realize it. I think what everyone is trying to get at is that you need to clearly establish your boundaries or it could get out of hand before you know it.
This is coming from somebody who crossed his girlfriend's boundaries (emotional, not physical), and unfortunately, it took her breaking up with me to realize what I was doing. Like you, there were times that my girlfriend tried telling me to stop what I was doing, but I kind blew them off like they were no big deal. The break up was a huge wake up call though, and once I did realize what I was doing, we were finally able to discuss our issues although it was very painful. You may discover that there are deeper issues that need to be dealt with by the two of you. Also, be aware that resolving this issue will probably take some time, since it's not easy for someone to change their behavior on demand. He has to believe that he should change and then be willing to work on changing.
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