billege

Thx Cyn.

So far as the term goes, *most* people won't use "retarded" to describe someone. If you choose to, or not, is entirely up to you. I'm not saying either way is better. It's the intention behind it so far as I'm concerned.

My father-in-law's brother is metally disabled. Leonard (my father in law) calls Marvin "retarded." Let me assure you, there's nothing but tenderness in Leonard's voice when he uses that term.

So far as the professional field goes, my wonderful wife manages a team of direct-care providers for people with developmental and mental disabilities. They generally do not use the term "retarded."

To address the correctness of the term: The DSM-IV uses it to describe degrees of mental retardation.

Mild, Moderate, Severe, and Profound mental retardation *are* the correct terms for the condition. Using them or not is up to you.

Link to text.

To address what the sister in law should or should not do:
It is typical (and I'm not saying you're evil if you said it) for those on the outside to suggest the family do more, etc.

However, very few people can relate to the experiance of providing assistance to a mentally retarded individual. It is easily all-consuming, exausting, mentally and emotionally draining.

This is where "It takes a village" rings very true. No man is an island, and no family should be made to be one either.

My thought? It's sad he can't ride his scooter anymore. I wish he could.

__________________
I can sum up the clash of religion in one sentence:
"My Invisible Friend is better than your Invisible Friend."