To me, the issue is that his expressions are invasive to very vulnerable people. A decent society should protect vulnerable members of that society (which we already do in many ways), and I think that a funeral (or a comparable death ritual) for example certainly qualifies for protection from provocative and invasive behavior that most citizens would recognise as disruptive. I believe I am a strong advocate of first amendment rights, but not to the extent that one group suffers unnecessarily at the sounds and sights of another group's hate speech (which to me is what Phelps is).
Again -- to see this group in action is infuriating. I remember how much I wanted to protect others from this bunch of idiots. Phelps and his group is offensive, and more importantly, provocative to people in a defensive human state (grief).
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less I say, smarter I am
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