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Cicero · 02-01-2006, 06:28 PM

Oh man, I love to collect quotes from movies, authors, and intelectuals. Unfortunately I never kept track of who quoted a lot of these words:

I'll make him an offer he can't refuse.
It's not personal, It's strictly business.
What happens when a man goes through his own portal?
After reading this we are all dumber because of it. I will receive no points and may God have mercy on our soul.
I can pretty much park a garbage truck in a closet if I have to.
Mantovani? They feed Mantovani to insomniacs who don't respond to strong drugs!
Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
Help! Help! I'm being oppressed! Violence inherent in the system! Violence inherent in the system!
I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream. That's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight... razor... and surviving.
Sparkling Muscatel. One of the finest wines of Idaho.
Look at 'em, ordinary fucking people, I hate 'em.
"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
If you're talking like a bitch, I'm gonna slap you like a bitch!
Esmerelda: What is your name? Butch: Butch. Esmerelda: What does it mean? Butch: I'm American, honey, our names don't mean shit.
Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to become comfortable?
If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions
You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else.
*After losing a hockey ball from the roof* Dante: Are there any balls down there? Jay: About the biggest pair you ever seen, dingleberry!
There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad.
I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.
Whether you can hear it or not The Universe is laughing behind your back.
I've been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech.
Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
I would love to stay here and talk with you... but I'm not going to.
Dip dip dive so-socialize, Open up your ears and clean out your eyes, if you learn to love you're in for a surprise, It could be nice to be alive.
Thanks, now we are all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view, really.
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
That's thirty minutes away. I'll be there in ten.
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
I have plenty of talent and vision - I just don't care.
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.
You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
What am I?? Flypaper for freaks?!
If I had wanted your website to make noise I would have licked my finger and rubbed it across the monitor.
I'm not being rude, you're just insignificant.
We are civilized human beings, not wild beasts. We are what we choose to be.
I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
If there is hope, it lies in the proles.
I will cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
Too much trippin' and my soul's worn thin.
It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
How about never? Is never good for you?
Slight disorientation after prolonged system uptime is normal for new Linux users. Please do not adjust your browser.
No, my powers can only be used for good.
I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
Read my lips, no new Texans.
You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
Capitalism isn't failing; our government has just herded us into a corporatist economy.
After 16 years, MTV has finally completed its deevolution into the shiny things network.
I'll try to be nicer if you'll try being smarter.
I'm out of my mind, feel free to leave a message...
I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
NASCAR = go fast, turn left.
Who me? I just wander from room to room.
My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
It is one thing to show a man he is in error, and another to put him in possession of the truth.
It might look like I'm doing nothing, but on the cellular level I'm quite busy.
At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
Tookie, Tookie!
You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Government is the only business uniquely authorized the use of deadly force to sell it's product.
Someday, you'll look back on this, laugh nervously and then change the subject.
Stupidity, like hydrogen, is one of the basic building blocks of the Universe.
Its not pretty being easy - but it's a job someone dirty has to do.
"I am, I exist" is necessarily true every time it is uttered by me or concieved in my mind.
Now there goes someone who's about as sharp as a sack full of wet mice.
If everything's under control, you're going too slow.
In politics stupidity is not a handicap.
I came, I saw, I conquered.
You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
I don't even know what street Canada is on.
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
My goal is simple. It is complete understanding of the universe, why it as it is and why it exists at all.
It's all fun and games, until someone loses an eye.
I would never belong to a group that would accept someone like me as a member.
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know.
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
Sorry, I wasn't paying attention to you, I was too busy looking at my own words.
an eye for an eye, and the whole world goes blind. - Ghandi
Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you.
A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers - and this is the basis of all human morality.
Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
But peace does not rest in the charters and covenants alone. It lies in the hearts and minds of all people. So let us not rest all our hopes on parchment and on paper, let us strive to build peace, a desire for peace, a willingness to work for peace in the hearts and minds of all of our people. I believe that we can. I believe the problems of human destiny are not beyond the reach of human beings.
He's dead, Jim!
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
This is a revolution, dammit! We're going to have to offend SOMEbody!
How right I am, How wrong they are.
With a gun barrel between your teeth, you speak only in vowels.
Each time a man stands up for an ideal Or acts to improve the lot of others Or strikes out against injustice He sends forth a tiny ripple of hope.
This is the business we chose.
Everybody just stay calm. The situation is under control.
I think The Matrix is so popular because it shows hackers with possibilities only dreamed of by most geeks... the possibility of getting laid.
Warning! Assholes are closer than they appear!
Communism is brainless; capitalism is heartless.
If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning... Smells like victory.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
When I was here, all I could think of was being there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back.
Anything is possible given time and money.
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
A reasonable man tries to adapt to the world around him. An unreasonable man tries to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all change is dependant upon the actions of unreasonable men.
The court ruled it legal to fuck the voters by running out the clock, and demonstrated how to do it.
Relax, my old man is a TV repairman, he's got an ultimate set of tools. I can fix it.
I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
Some people see things as they are and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not.
I believe in America. America has made my fortune.

02-01-2006, 06:28 PM	#49 (permalink)
Cicero Tilted	Oh man, I love to collect quotes from movies, authors, and intelectuals. Unfortunately I never kept track of who quoted a lot of these words: I'll make him an offer he can't refuse. It's not personal, It's strictly business. What happens when a man goes through his own portal? After reading this we are all dumber because of it. I will receive no points and may God have mercy on our soul. I can pretty much park a garbage truck in a closet if I have to. Mantovani? They feed Mantovani to insomniacs who don't respond to strong drugs! Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity. Help! Help! I'm being oppressed! Violence inherent in the system! Violence inherent in the system! I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream. That's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight... razor... and surviving. Sparkling Muscatel. One of the finest wines of Idaho. Look at 'em, ordinary fucking people, I hate 'em. "It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both. If you're talking like a bitch, I'm gonna slap you like a bitch! Esmerelda: What is your name? Butch: Butch. Esmerelda: What does it mean? Butch: I'm American, honey, our names don't mean shit. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to become comfortable? If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else. After losing a hockey ball from the roof Dante: Are there any balls down there? Jay: About the biggest pair you ever seen, dingleberry! There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad. I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me. Whether you can hear it or not The Universe is laughing behind your back. I've been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech. Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something. I would love to stay here and talk with you... but I'm not going to. Dip dip dive so-socialize, Open up your ears and clean out your eyes, if you learn to love you're in for a surprise, It could be nice to be alive. Thanks, now we are all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view, really. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. That's thirty minutes away. I'll be there in ten. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. I have plenty of talent and vision - I just don't care. A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti. You remind me of when I was young and stupid. What am I?? Flypaper for freaks?! If I had wanted your website to make noise I would have licked my finger and rubbed it across the monitor. I'm not being rude, you're just insignificant. We are civilized human beings, not wild beasts. We are what we choose to be. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. If there is hope, it lies in the proles. I will cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. Too much trippin' and my soul's worn thin. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial. How about never? Is never good for you? Slight disorientation after prolonged system uptime is normal for new Linux users. Please do not adjust your browser. No, my powers can only be used for good. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me. Read my lips, no new Texans. You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication. Capitalism isn't failing; our government has just herded us into a corporatist economy. After 16 years, MTV has finally completed its deevolution into the shiny things network. I'll try to be nicer if you'll try being smarter. I'm out of my mind, feel free to leave a message... I don't work here. I'm a consultant. NASCAR = go fast, turn left. Who me? I just wander from room to room. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys! It is one thing to show a man he is in error, and another to put him in possession of the truth. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but on the cellular level I'm quite busy. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits. Tookie, Tookie! You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. Government is the only business uniquely authorized the use of deadly force to sell it's product. Someday, you'll look back on this, laugh nervously and then change the subject. Stupidity, like hydrogen, is one of the basic building blocks of the Universe. Its not pretty being easy - but it's a job someone dirty has to do. "I am, I exist" is necessarily true every time it is uttered by me or concieved in my mind. Now there goes someone who's about as sharp as a sack full of wet mice. If everything's under control, you're going too slow. In politics stupidity is not a handicap. I came, I saw, I conquered. You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone. I don't even know what street Canada is on. The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. My goal is simple. It is complete understanding of the universe, why it as it is and why it exists at all. It's all fun and games, until someone loses an eye. I would never belong to a group that would accept someone like me as a member. Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know. Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. Sorry, I wasn't paying attention to you, I was too busy looking at my own words. an eye for an eye, and the whole world goes blind. - Ghandi Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you. A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers - and this is the basis of all human morality. Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president but they don't want them to become politicians in the process. But peace does not rest in the charters and covenants alone. It lies in the hearts and minds of all people. So let us not rest all our hopes on parchment and on paper, let us strive to build peace, a desire for peace, a willingness to work for peace in the hearts and minds of all of our people. I believe that we can. I believe the problems of human destiny are not beyond the reach of human beings. He's dead, Jim! If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? This is a revolution, dammit! We're going to have to offend SOMEbody! How right I am, How wrong they are. With a gun barrel between your teeth, you speak only in vowels. Each time a man stands up for an ideal Or acts to improve the lot of others Or strikes out against injustice He sends forth a tiny ripple of hope. This is the business we chose. Everybody just stay calm. The situation is under control. I think The Matrix is so popular because it shows hackers with possibilities only dreamed of by most geeks... the possibility of getting laid. Warning! Assholes are closer than they appear! Communism is brainless; capitalism is heartless. If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. I love the smell of napalm in the morning... Smells like victory. Black holes are where God divided by zero. When I was here, all I could think of was being there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back. Anything is possible given time and money. I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth. A reasonable man tries to adapt to the world around him. An unreasonable man tries to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all change is dependant upon the actions of unreasonable men. The court ruled it legal to fuck the voters by running out the clock, and demonstrated how to do it. Relax, my old man is a TV repairman, he's got an ultimate set of tools. I can fix it. I criticize by creation - not by finding fault. Leave the gun. Take the cannoli. Some people see things as they are and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not. I believe in America. America has made my fortune.