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dad told me i was a worse than senseless thing
mom told me i'd never be better than a dildo
my older sister even made fun of me
after dressing me up as a doll
too ugly to be real she said
and asked mom and dad for a replacement brother
but what they've never understood
and what no one has ever understood
is that i'm completely cool
when faced with death
of some type
heard a story long ago about joe montana
quarterback for the san francisco 49ers football team
very important game he was in
very important drive he was leading the team on
it meant win or lose for the team
everyone was pumped up for it
and he walked into the huddle
and pointed out a fan
and said "isn't that john candy?"
just too stupid to be afraid.
but with the talent to get it done
like me
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