|
I'm not happy, nor sad. I can't think of any terms that properly express how I feel about the status of my life. Happy and sad are relative, higher or lower than my "normal" state. I don't endeavor to be "happy". I can't always feel better than I usually am because that means happy has become the median, the norm. I feel many things when I reflect on my life and what i've accomplished- joy, pride, regret, anger, embarrasment, shame, satisfaction.
In my life I now seek out things that give me pleasure, excitement, danger, challenge me, or make me afraid. They have value- whether economic, emotional, or for my inner self. I don't believe in the goal of safety- if I stay somewhere safe and comfortable I will stagnate. Once you stop taking risks you lose out on potential benefit. It doesn't mean I don't see the value in safety or comfort, just that it should be moderated. Protect the ones you love. Feel the comfort and safety of those you can trust; and also risk yourself by trusting them.
The best thing I believe I can do in my life is to take risks, to keep moving forward. Learn new things, and live up to the principles I believe in. To better my life, and the lives of those around me, that is the "happiness" I have found.
__________________
"Asking a bomb squad if an old bomb is still "real" is not the best thing to do if you want to save it." - denim
|