Quote:
|
Originally Posted by maleficent
i'd love to see the female version  |
As requested.
"We need."
Really means...
"I want."
"It's your decision"
Really means...
"The correct decision should be obvious by now."
"Do what you want."
Really means...
"You'll pay for this later."
"We need to talk."
Really means...
"I need to complain."
"Sure...go ahead."
Really means...
"I don't want you to."
"I'm not upset."
Really means...
"Of course I'm upset, you moron."
"You're...so manly."
Really means...
"You need a shave and you sweat a lot."
"You're certainly attentive tonight."
Really means...
"Is sex all you ever think about?"
"Be romantic, turn out the lights."
Really means...
"I have flabby thighs."
"This kitchen is so inconvenient."
Really means...
"I want a new house."
"I want new curtains."
Really means...
"and carpeting, furniture, wallpaper..."
"Hang the picture there."
Really means...
"No, I mean hang it there!"
"I heard a noise."
Really means...
"I noticed you were almost asleep."
"Do you love me?"
Really means...
"I'm going to ask for something expensive."
"How much do you love me?"
Really means...
"I did something today you're really not going to like."
"I'll be ready in a minute."
Really means...
"Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.:
"Is my butt fat?"
Really means...
"Tell me I'm beautiful."
"You have to learn to communicate."
Really means...
"Just agree with me."
"Are you listening to me!?"
Really means...
[Too late, you're dead.]
"Yes."
Really means...
"No."
"No."
Really means...
"No."
"Maybe."
Really means...
"No."
"I'm sorry."
Really means...
"You'll be sorry."
"Do you like this recipe?"
Really means...
"It's easy to fix, so you'd better get get used to it."
"I'm not yelling!"
Really means...
"Yes I am yelling because I think this is important."
In answer to the question "What's wrong?"
"The same old thing."
Really means...
"Nothing."
"Nothing."
Really means...
"Everything."
"Everything."
Really means...
"My PMS is acting up."
"Nothing, really."
Really means...
"It's just that you're such a jerk."
"I don't want to talk about it."
Really means...
"Go away, I'm still building up evidence against you."