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Originally Posted by xepherys
I know a lot of gay people that say "that's so gay" and mean it mostly the same way anyone else would. If something is "gay" it's usually to say that it's the opposite of macho.
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Sure, in that context, it's being used in the common sense of the word, which is roughly overtly feminine behaviors engaged in by males, or to describe sterotypically homosexual behaviors. In such a context, it's merely descriptive and serves a useful function.
However, for some, perhaps many in our society, such behavior is seen as wrong, as a man somehow lowering himself by acting like a woman, an attitude that by itself is sexist and demaning.
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Is it deragatory? Sometimes, but not always.
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When used in the manner above, of course not.
However, the manner in which I hear it being used is to mean, "Something that I dislike for any reason," or "stupid and of little value," in other words, it's become the slang word for "bullshit," shorthand for describing something of which the speaker disapproves.
When used in this manner, yes, it's offensive, as it's playing off of an assumed negative connection with qualities associated with gays--cellophanedeity said it very well earlier.
Example: In class yesterday morning, as I was going over class policies with one of my classes, one of the students, taking exception with my policies, described them as "gay". Now, I doubt he knows that I'm homosexual, and even if he does, I very much doubt that he meant my class policies were typical of those used by homosexual professors without passing judgement on them. No, he meant, as does the vast majority of adolescents when using the term in a slang manner, that he thought they were stupid, which is to say, he disliked them.
I don't ever think I've heard the phrase, "this is so gay" outside of my immediate family, anyway, used to describe something in a neutral way.
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I think there is a certain level of respect one should have for others, but yes, I do think that's it's a bit over sensitive, BigBen. I am 100% against political correctness. If I could be, I'd be more than 100% against it.
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What do you mean by "political correctness" here?
I don't think being cognizant of potential offense to others and trying to be polite in how you speak when you're around others as being "political correctness"; I think of it as good manners.
I'd add to the above phrases, "Be a man," often used to encourage boys participating in sports or who are showing fear, used to mean roughly, "Don't be a sissy," or "Don't be a wimp", implying that courage or perseverance are male qualities.
Offensive, maybe a tiny bit, but nonetheless gender stereotyping, which can have a profound cumulative effect over time on attitudes.
Gilda