|
President Rick
Location: location location
|
King Kong: 5 out of 10
I was going to list why I rated it the way I did, but I read a review on IMDB that, while a little harshe, pretty much summed up the things I disliked about the film.
Quote:
With the technology available for special effects, this could have been a great movie. Unfortunately, it wasn't. Sadly, this movie just proves the point that good effects do not a good movie make.
What happened here is that a film with enough plot to last for the time of the original was stretched out to try fill 3 hours of screen time, and the result is disastrous. In addition, it's pretty clear that CGI nerds and video game designers had way too much input into this atrocity.
It can all be summarized with a top 10 list of the worst scenes/mistakes of the movie:
10. The time wasting, overly long, irrelevant plot line surrounding Ann Darrow, the old man, and the theater getting closed down. Not pertinent to the story.
9. The CGI nerd focus on the spinning airplane wheels on the fighter planes. Someone said "Isn't this the coolest thing you've ever seen?". It only lasted a few seconds, but it was there only because some GIGANTIC nerd wanted it in. Guess what? It's NOT cool.
8. The plot line surrounding Jimmy and Mr. Hayes. Unnecessary, irrelevant, and ultimately unresolved. Why was Hayes protective of Jimmy? Did Jimmy go on to make something of himself? We never know. Why did anyone have to know he read "Heart of Darkness" or any of the other nonsense that was discussed between them? Total waste of time, stalls the story.
7. Kong violently shaking Ann around after he gets to his home turf, and her suffering no ill effects. She'd be not only injured, but dead. Kong was supposed to be gentle with Ann, duh. Totally missed the point.
6. The time wasting, overly long, irritating scenes where Kong repeatedly roars for no good reason. CGI nerds/effects people are responsible, I'm certain. They obviously took over the whole movie. Probable discussion: "Isn't the roar the coolest thing you've ever seen/heard? Let's use it 47 times!"
5. The completely ludicrous scene where Kong smashes the stolen taxi but Driscoll (inside) isn't even scratched. Guess what? That's right, he'd be dead. Come on, you can at least TRY to make this thing believable.
4. The completely awful scene where Kong fights 3 T-Rexes while holding Anne in his hand. For the love of God, she'd be killed instantly. At least the original had the sense to have him put her down to fight the tyrannosaurus, a key element ignored in the remake, here and elsewhere in the movie. They also miss the point about the planes holding back when Kong is holding Ann, see above. Point missed.
And the top 3…
3. The incredibly preposterous and insulting scene where Jimmy shoots all the CGI nerd created insects off of Driscoll. Shuts his eyes while firing, and hits all the bugs. It wasn't just reminiscent of Jar-Jar Binks in the big battle with the gun stuck on his tail, it WAS Jar-Jar Binks in the big battle with the gun stuck on his tail. Totally unacceptable.
2. The even more preposterous and more insulting and asinine Brontosaurus stampede scene. This one almost takes the cake for worst scene in movie history, if not for the next one. Beyond ridiculous, totally unbelievable, video-game quality. Graphics cheesy and unrealistic. CGI nerds were probably slapping high fives seeing how many asinine near-miss, "Raptor almost gets the character before being stomped by the brontosaurus", Tom and Jerry scenes they could create. Asinine beyond belief.
1. The horrible, horrible ridiculous scene where Kong and Ann et all are falling through the vines, getting caught repeatedly by new vines swinging out, not getting injured, falling again, caught by another swinging vine, not getting injured, etc. Vines pendulum-like swinging with the monster almost gobbling Ann up, only to be just out of reach, repeatedly. This didn't belong in "King Kong", it belonged in "Donkey Kong Jr.".
If you removed all this irrelevant nonsense, what would remain might not have been that bad. It would probably be quite good, in fact. Sadly, it was left in. It's hard to imagine how insufferable a DVD "Director's Cut" could be.
On the positive side, Naomi Watts was excellent, as was Jack Black. The acting in general was a positive, no real complaints there. And the animation of Kong himself was excellent. Very well done.
Sadly though, very little of the movie involved acting. It was all about making it a big video game and putting in all the effects. The effects are not themselves the movie, they are there to support the movie!
To summarize, there were a lot of good pieces, but there were also a lot of bad ones. Ultimately too many were used, and a lot of them did not belong
|
__________________
This post is content. If you don't like it then you are not content. Or perhaps just incontinent.
This is not a link - Do not click here
I hate animated avatars.
|