Sweetie, you only think you know what you want. Trust us, we know what's best for you
.
Seriously, though?
It's because women are often taught not to be assertive about what we want, to drop hints and make suggestions and be flexible and ready to adapt to what our partner wants. We're taught not to ask for what we want, so we frequently ask for something a little bit less, or offer a suggestion of what we think our partner might actually want us to say instead of what we actually want.
Yes, it's bullshit, and we don't all do it, but it is part of the training a great many of us get in how to be a girl in this society.
So what does that mean to your situation? It's generalizing from one to all, a way of thinking a great many people engage in--the way I think is how everyone must think. If I don't really mean what I say the first time, then you must not mean what you say the first time. A conversation becomes a negotiation to arrive at the truth, not a simle exchange of information.
As you get to know each other it'll either get better, or you'll learn to live with it.
Gilda