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Originally Posted by Jesseboy
Unfortunately, time and time again has proven that drinking is very important to her - "a good time" has on several occasions come before our relationship.
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That statement right there confirms one thing: She has an addiction. And not necessarily to alcohol.
She is willing to put drinking and partying(cause that's what it is) before the relationship, and her own well-being. Blacking out in a bar with strangers hitting on her is not safe at all. If she keeps up that kind of behavior, it is very likely that at the least she will cheat on you, or at the worst wind up brutally raped and murdered.
Just because she only goes out drinking occasionally does not indicate that there is no addiction, frequency doesn't have as much to do with addiction as dependance does. If she feels dependant upon alcohol to have a good time, then she has become addicted to it.
IMHO, you are not being jealous or over-protective, you have very real concerns and fears that seem to be well justified. If she is more concerned about going out and "having fun" then she is about you, then you may want to think long and hard about this relationship. It may take more of a wake-up call than you would like to think to get her to stop drinking. But I doubt that a more "desirable" option will do it.
Oh, and video taping her without her knowledge would be a very, very bad decision. It would likely just get her pissed off and defensive about the whole situation, and bring up even more trust issues. If you do decide to tape her drunken behavior, I would strongly suggest letting her know before hand. And setting up a situation to make her do something stupid seems just as bad to me. Just my opinion though.