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Martian · 01-02-2006, 10:35 PM

Birth control may be a factor. A more productive line of inquiry would be to look back at September with an eye to what may have caused this change. I'm assuming you had a reasonably active sex life before then. There are a lot of different medications that can cause a decrease in libido, along with changes in diet, depression or just plain old stress. Did she start school in September and is maybe feeling a bit overworked at the moment? As much as it's maligned as an excuse, being too tired can be a legitimate reason. Or maybe she started on a medication for something or other? My ex once had to take medication for frequent migraines that completely killed her sex drive. A quick trip to the doctor had that cleared up; she was switched to something else and normal activity resumed.

Has she gained any weight? It's possible that a low self-image is causing her to feel undesirable and therefore keeping her from getting in the mood. If this is the case, a little effort on your part can go a long way; give her an old-fashioned night of romance (candle-lit dinner, sensual massage, etc etc) and it may help.

Umm.. a final factor that I'm a bit hesitant to bring up... has she previously expressed satisfaction with your performance? Girls don't need to get off every time they have sex (neither do guys for that matter) but they do need it once in a while. If she's not getting a lot of pleasure out of it it may become undesirable for her. The solution and a trick I've used since my earliest days in the sack is to make the first ten minutes all about her. Try kissing her in a variety of paces. Specific spots that are very sensitive are the inside of the elbows, the back of the knees, the side of the waist, the inside of the wrists, the fingertips, the inner thighs, between her breasts and of course, the nipples and genitals. Exploring and appreciating her body will get her in the mood and also make her feel good about herself. Oral and manual stimulation are also good. A common warmup is the 69, but it's not for beginners; the positioning can be a bit awkward and you may have a hard time focussing on what you're doing while she's sucking on your wang.

If you're not sure you can get her off through actual intercourse (which may be her as much as it is you, so don't feel bad if that's the case) try to do so before the intercourse actually happens. If she orgasms regularly she'll keep wanting sex.

The fact that she's still doing her best to please you says to me that she does want to continue having sex with you, but that there's some other factor getting in the way here. Do a bit of digging and see if you can't figure out what that may be. She'll thank you in the long run.

01-02-2006, 10:35 PM	#4 (permalink)
Martian Young Crumudgeon Location: Canada	Birth control may be a factor. A more productive line of inquiry would be to look back at September with an eye to what may have caused this change. I'm assuming you had a reasonably active sex life before then. There are a lot of different medications that can cause a decrease in libido, along with changes in diet, depression or just plain old stress. Did she start school in September and is maybe feeling a bit overworked at the moment? As much as it's maligned as an excuse, being too tired can be a legitimate reason. Or maybe she started on a medication for something or other? My ex once had to take medication for frequent migraines that completely killed her sex drive. A quick trip to the doctor had that cleared up; she was switched to something else and normal activity resumed. Has she gained any weight? It's possible that a low self-image is causing her to feel undesirable and therefore keeping her from getting in the mood. If this is the case, a little effort on your part can go a long way; give her an old-fashioned night of romance (candle-lit dinner, sensual massage, etc etc) and it may help. Umm.. a final factor that I'm a bit hesitant to bring up... has she previously expressed satisfaction with your performance? Girls don't need to get off every time they have sex (neither do guys for that matter) but they do need it once in a while. If she's not getting a lot of pleasure out of it it may become undesirable for her. The solution and a trick I've used since my earliest days in the sack is to make the first ten minutes all about her. Try kissing her in a variety of paces. Specific spots that are very sensitive are the inside of the elbows, the back of the knees, the side of the waist, the inside of the wrists, the fingertips, the inner thighs, between her breasts and of course, the nipples and genitals. Exploring and appreciating her body will get her in the mood and also make her feel good about herself. Oral and manual stimulation are also good. A common warmup is the 69, but it's not for beginners; the positioning can be a bit awkward and you may have a hard time focussing on what you're doing while she's sucking on your wang. If you're not sure you can get her off through actual intercourse (which may be her as much as it is you, so don't feel bad if that's the case) try to do so before the intercourse actually happens. If she orgasms regularly she'll keep wanting sex. The fact that she's still doing her best to please you says to me that she does want to continue having sex with you, but that there's some other factor getting in the way here. Do a bit of digging and see if you can't figure out what that may be. She'll thank you in the long run. __________________ I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said - Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame