I apologize for the length of this post.
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Originally Posted by aubreyd
...I just wish her school would enforce tougher rules on the way the kids dress...
...For instance, my daughter is a cheerleader and even her cheerleading uniform crosses the line a bit. Indeed it's not slutty looking but it does have a shorter than normal skirt with a top that shows her stomach slightly. I agree thats the way those uniforms are meant to be but i can't believe they let these girls wear them to school....
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We have placed such a burden on these grossly underpaid people. Hypertasking has become a way of life for most teachers - children have so much more to face at an increasingly younger age. There are dress codes. The students are aware of them, as should be the parents. We should be setting the standard at home. Some parents seem incapable of doing this. Conversely, these rules send mixed messages. What is not acceptable to wear to school is the uniform of choice for certain activities (cheerleading, dance team, etc.?). I also take into account the students that are not allowed to wear make up/certain clothes and then do so after leaving the house. You do what you can. Some should try harder.
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Originally Posted by Zeld2.0
...And I noticed, year after year, a similar trend - clothes get more sexualized as each year passes...
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I agree and am appalled. Before becoming a parent, I never thought I would say this. Unfortunately, there is little we can do to control the media and those that implement trends. We can set examples and standards for our children though, and clarify expectations. Kind of off on a tangent, but it ties in.
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Originally Posted by Grace, Too
...Fifth, I am a teacher. I see the girls come each day to school dressed like sluts. They become associated as sluts because that's what they dress like. SHAME on the parents who let their kids (up to age 16) dress the way some of them do. You are a big part of what is wrong with society. SHAME on the parents who don't have the balls to be a parent and tell them what is and what is not appropriate...
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When picking up my daughter from highschool on occasion, I am disgusted by the various states of undress. They looked as if they were dressed (to borrow a phrase) "to go clubbing in Vegas" rather than attend school. It made me sick. I don't know what was more disgusting - the way they dressed or the way that these kids are allowed to speak to each other in front of school staff. Teachers are expected to pick up WAY too much of the slack in the way of parenting skills. It's unfair not only to the teachers and staff, but to the children who are losing valuable time that should be spent learning to this bullshit.
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Originally Posted by SecretMethod70
Instead of addressing - from the beginning, not just when they first appear as problems - the underlying emotional issues, we are trying to remedy them through consumerism, materialism, and falsehood. Teenage cosmetic surgery is on the rise. Why? Because it's easier to address the THING that the child identifies as the source of her emotional problem than the emotional problem itself.
There are plenty of people considered ugly who feel it absolutely imperitive that they work to conform, through changes in fashion or even surgery, to society's standards. Only that's never enough because it doesn't address the real issue.
Likewise, there are plenty of people who would be considered ugly by most who have no significant problems with themselves. They accept themselves for who they are and do not feel the need to go to such extremes to conform to the expectations of others.
This is what must be addressed from the moment a child is born. The material and social constructs must be openly discussed and challenged. The child must understand - to the degree he is capable - the forces at work around him.
There will always be peer pressure of various kinds, and I think there is a severe defecit in the empowering of children to resist pressure and think for themselves. This defecit is only strengthened by the effects of Mass Media Mind Control directed towards the parents AND the children. When an executive of "forever21" freely talks about using parents longing for their youth to make them buy sexy clothes for their duaghters in the hope of recapturing it vicariously, it's clear that there is a serious reason to question who is in real control of the decisions and attitudes in our society. The peer pressures that children feel today are direct results of corporate influence and agendas.
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Thank you for wording so eloquently what I meant to say.
Being a parent and a "friend" to your children is such a fine line to walk. I would choose being a parent over being a friend, hands down. I see it as being a sounding board more than a friend. I respect my children's opinions and ideals, but ultimately they must respect me as their parent. PERIOD.
In my house: 12 year old + thong = NO
This is my opinion as a former rebellious child and a parent.